As the first post for this blog I thought I would set the tone for what I hope will be a constructive environment for consultants and those seeking consulting services. It is my desire that by showing how everyday activities can be an opportunity to make us better at what we do we make ourselves more approachable by those in need of our services but haven't found the inclination to reach out.

The other night I had the pleasure of speaking with a woman, in her mid 30's, about relationships and finding that special person. She was in a relationship for about 6 years and never fully committed to it because of an issue that she felt was very important to her. The issue was debt. Apparently her significant other had consumer debt in the high 5 figures. While I have been involved in client cases where higher amounts have been seen, she just did not feel comfortable going any further in that relationship.

The issue to me isn't the debt, but how the debt was acquired and how is it being managed. To her it was simply that it existed. First, the nominal amount of debt is not important. How it relates as a percentage to overall income and how the structure of the repayment affects his life is more significant. Whether it is managable or not, is one thing; what is the nature of the debt is another.

We all have interests. And when those interests become something more then they become vices or obsessions. Gambling, Sex, Clothes, Technology, etc, can be the more serious issue that is only presently manifested in the form of debt. For this woman, curbing the debt is only treating the symptom.

However debt on his part was only half the issue. The other issue was how she was raised. She was raised with a frugal father, who retired at the age of 48. Now I don't think he retired in the true sense of the word. I think he left his chosen profession or vocation, but I think he found a more relaxed lifestyle while working at some less demanding position. But I digress. He was so thrifty that it affected the way his daughter perceives money, finances, and debt.

Such a terrible situation. A man with debt that may or not be an issue with repayment and that may or not be an issue with regard to the nature of it is not able to keep or extend a relationship with a woman because of her fathers frugality creating an intolerance for debt or debt management.